welcome
to yoururl.blogspot.com
be my escape- relient k
I’ve given up on giving up slowly, I’m blending in so
You won’t even know me apart from this whole world that shares my fate
This one last bullet you mention is my one last shot at redemption
because I know to live you must give your life away
And I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and
I’ve been locked inside that house all the while You hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me
And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because
I gotta get outta here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
I gotta get outta here
And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging You to be my escape.
I’m giving up on doing this alone now
Cause I’ve failed and I’m ready to be shown how
He’s told me the way and I’m trying to get there
And this life sentence that I’m serving
I admit that I’m every bit deserving
But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair
Cause I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and
I’ve been locked inside that house all the while You hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me
And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because
I gotta get outta here
Cause I’m afraid that this complacency is something I can’t shake
I gotta get outta here
And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging You to be my escape.
I am a hostage to my own humanity
Self detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made
And all I’m asking is for You to do what You can with me
But I can’t ask You to give what You already gave
Cause I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and
I’ve been locked inside that house all the while you hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me
And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because
I’ve gotta get outta here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
I’ve gotta get outta here
And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging
You to be my escape.
I fought You for so long
I should have let You in
Oh how we regret those things we do
And all I was trying to do was save my own skin
But so were You
So were You
Sunday, November 14, 2004
Title:
Comments:
was reading through my blog enteries of the past few weeks, and i realised that all i've been talking about is how much i'm looking forward to the future. it's a relief to finally be able to walk out from the shadows of the past, after months of trying to pick up the pieces of my life. it's been painful, but i've grown up so much in the past few months. i've learnt lessons that will last me a lifetime.
perhaps tomorrow i'll be back here, pouring out all the anger and hatred in my heart. but i understand this: no one said that it'll always be smooth sailing. i guess we shouldn't ask for too much, just live life one day at a time and try to enjoy it as much as we can.
one thing i've learnt through it all is that: we can't control what others do, we can only control what we do. things don't always work out according to plan, but long as we've done what we should have done, we should be happy for that.
i'm not perfect, and i'm not trying for perfection. i simply want to be somebody who's at peace with herself and what she has done with her life, her opportunites.
everyone has a good side, a nice side. it's simply the piorities, the choices we make, the things we choose to do with our lives, that seperates a life worthwell and a worthless life.
don't you think so?
there's a scene from a movie called bang bang you're dead that left a lasting impression on me. it's a scene at the church hall, where the drama teacher, i can't remember his name let's call him Mr S, talks to an angry young man named trevor about the play they were putting on. trevour had threatened to blow up the football team a year before.
the name of the play: bang bang you're dead. the play is about the mind of a kid who murders his parents and 5 kids at school. the kid's name is josh.
Trevor: this is stupid.
Mr S: why is this stupid, trevor?
Trevor: his girlfriend gets stolen and he kills 7 people? it's stupid.
Mr S: and what makes his actions any stupider than yours?
Trevor: i'm not a killer.
Mr S: what's so different about you and josh, trevor? what is it in you that stops you frm killing people?
Trevor: i don't know.
Mr S: whatever it is, let's called it X. if i reached deep into your soul and took out X, what will happen?
Trevor: ....I'll....be him.
X.
